Special Resources and Insights

A Note to Families with a History of Domestic Abuse

Guidance, including on using this website, when there has been abuse against a parent or child. 

3 Girls' Invisible Pain

Lessons from These 3 Girls

  1. Kids need and want some simple things, like courteous communication between their parents.
  2. No matter how small the topic (birthdays, holidays, pickups, etc.), parent fights leave kids badly hurt.
  3. Kids don't want one parent to win the fight; kids want one parent to stop the fight.
  4. Kids almost never care about the things we parents are fighting about; they just want the fights to stop.
  5. When parents fight, kids' real needs can become invisible.
  6. Kids experience attacks between their parents as attacks on them.
  7. Parent fights can force kids to try to resolve adult issues - and to blame themselves when they fail.

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